Noble Togie:--There are only two ways a hero can remain a hero in
this strange world of ours. One way is to die just after he has
heroed, and the other way is to get in a glass case and stay
there--but he must buy the glass case himself.
Unbeatable Togie:--When the public gets a jag of joy from the
intoxication of your success they will surely rush up to you with
the plans and specifications of a fine bungalow with hot and cold
gas and running servants, but when they do so just place the left
hand in the apex of the waistcoat and say to them with a cold
glitter in the lamps, "I thank you, public, for this display of
generosity, but I would prefer that you keep the bungalow and I
will keep my own little flat on 109th Street, because I know the
janitor there and he never steals the milk."
Nice Togie:--Republics and any old kind of publics are always
grateful while the jag of joy lasts. They are dead anxious to give
a hero more than is coming to him, but after the jag of joy wears
off then comes the bitter morning after, when they wake up with the
head full of third-rail microbes and the tongue like a bridge with
the draw open, and they keep saying to themselves, "Why did I give
that hero such a nice house, because, to save my soul, I can't
remember just what kind of heroing he did to deserve it."
My dear Togie:--Avoid the kissing buggettas and don't pay any
attention to the house committee and possibly you will be able to
keep on your heroesque way to the bitter end.
Pages:
26
27
28
29
30
31
32
33
34
35
36
37
38
39
40
41
42
43
44
45
46
47
48
49
50